For example, do you have a project coming due at school that you were working on together? You can discuss how it will be awkward at first, but you can push through it. Or, if you don’t think you can, agree to ask the teacher for new partners. Neither of you should have to give up friends because of the breakup. Talk with your ex about how it might be weird at first to hang out together with your friends, but over time, it will become easier.
Your ex needs to respect your wishes as well. Don’t feel guilted or pressured into a post-breakup situation that makes you uncomfortable.
Never post private information or pictures of your ex on social media with the intent of hurting them. You may think that lashing out at them publicly will feel good or that “they deserve it,” but in the end, it won’t feel very good to do it and you’ll wish you hadn’t.
It’s best to not share passwords with your partner when you are in a relationship. If you maintain your own privacy and set some boundaries during the relationship, it’s much easier to deal with a breakup, if it happens.
For example, if you know you always run into them in the hall between 3rd and 4th periods or you share the same lunch period, try to make sure you are talking with and surrounded by friends during that time.
If your ex has been mean to you or the breakup has been super awkward, just avoid eye contact and keep moving. You don’t have to say hello or be pleasant unless you want to.
To take the high road, you can respond to their meanness by calmly telling them to stop, laughing it off, or just saying nothing and walking away. Often when people bully someone, it’s because they are trying to get a reaction out of them. If you give them no reaction, it reduces their desire to keep being mean.
If it has been a few weeks and you feel like you aren’t making any progress, talk to a trusted friend or responsible adult about getting help dealing with your feelings.
Sometimes crying can catch you off guard. In the days following the relationship, you may see or think about something that triggers an emotional response and brings tears to your eyes. That’s totally normal and it’s best to just let it out. Some examples of spaces to cry privately are in the shower, in your bedroom, or outdoors somewhere you can be by yourself.
It’s a great help to talk to someone who has been through a breakup before. Just knowing that someone else has felt what you feel can be very comforting.
Protect your privacy if you are writing down very personal thoughts. Use a journal that you keep hidden or save your thoughts in a password-protected folder on your computer.
Whatever you do, be careful that is not something that will constantly remind you of your ex. For example, if your ex loved to skateboard, it’s not the best time to learn to skateboard. Instead, look for something to change up your routine that is uniquely suited to your personality.
Don’t change your look to try to torture or tempt your ex. Do it for yourself as part of your healing process.
Look for activities where you can make new friends. For example, you could join a theater or martial arts class or whatever interests you. Anything that gets you off the couch and motivates you will work.
If you are unsure if a behavior is threatening or harassing, seek advice from an adult or a close friend. Sometimes little things escalate into bigger things and an outsider perspective can help you understand what’s happening more clearly. If your ex threatens to share private information or pictures that you do not want to get out, report it immediately to an adult that you trust. If you are too embarrassed or afraid to go to your parents, talk to an aunt or uncle or the school guidance counselor. [18] X Research source Know that if you blackmail your ex or share any private texts or pictures, you could get into serious trouble. These behaviors are crimes that carry severe punishment. [19] X Research source
You can also contact the a suicide prevention hotline, such as the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline if you’re in the United States, which can be reached by calling or texting 988. You can also visit their website at https://988lifeline. org/.
